Obsessing

Do you obsess like I obsess? It seems anything I am incredibly interested in, concerned about, or excited about I obsess on it. The dictionary defines obsess as "to think about something unceasingly or persistently." Now when I obsess on a good thing, it can lead to productivity. For example, every Christmas Jess and I like to make little Christmas gifts to give to teacher friends and acquaintances and whomever else we feel the need to spread love and good cheer to! So, sometime in October, I get a terrific idea for a Christmas gift. I get excited about it and start researching where we can get the best price for all the supplies. Every time Jess and I talk, the subject comes up and and we brainstorm a little more. This can be a productive obsessing. But what happens when I start obsessing on a negative thing? I recently received a medical test result that was somewhat concerning. Of course, I started thinking about it every time I was alone. I talked to Brian about it every time we were alone. I did not want anyone to know about this yet, so I didn't talk with anyone else about it. Fortunately, I  don't tend to dwell on negative thoughts, so I normally stay away from researching on the internet. This one time though, I decided to try to learn a little more about my recent test result. Brian was out of town and I had some time to try to satisfy my need to know more. Thankfully, the first site I visited provided what turned out to be accurate information. My test results were not as ominous as they first sounded. whew! I decided to stop my search with this first finding. But what if I would have continued to dig up more and more information? What if I searched and searched until I had read loads of information, maybe not as accurate as the first site I went to? What if I would have read late into the night and then not been able to sleep because of all that I had read? Surely, this would have been a recipe for disaster the next day at work! This is when obsessing becomes detrimental to our well being. During this very long week with an unsettling secret, I came to rely on Philippians 4:8.  "Think about the things that are good and worthy of praise. Think about the things that are true and honorable and right and pure and beautiful and respected." Now, this is worth obsessing on! That week, every time a negative thought crossed my mind, I forced myself to stop, say this verse, and focus my mind on a positive thought --like what I was going to make for Christmas!
The next time you find yourself obsessing over a negative situation, try stopping and changing your thoughts to think about the things that are good, true, honorable, pure, beautiful and respected.

50 before 50

I turned 49 on my last birthday. That makes me in my 50th year of life. Contemplating turning 50 within the next year, I decided that I want to set some goals and create some accomplishments for this 50th year of life. I spent a considerable amount of time speculating what goals I should make. I wanted them to be attainable. Reading 50 books in a year is just not realistic for me! There is no reason to set that as a goal. I wanted to have a variety of goals, ones that touched the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. I included some challenging goals, ones that would stretch me a bit. And I created some easy goals, ones I could check off throughout the year and keep me motivated. I know it sounds like a lot of goals -it is. It's OK. I have a whole year to accomplish them. :)
I also decided to keep a separate journal just for this year. It is actually a planner. I listed my goals in the front of the book. I write my thoughts each day in the square space for the date. In the "To-Do" section, I write about my progress on the goals. I am disappointed to say that I am a little behind in my progress. I know there is still plenty of time (9 months) to attain all the written declarations, but I don't want to be cramming in the last month!
Anyway, instead of dreading the big 5-0 or being disappointed with the lack of fanfare, I decided to try the outward approach. I hope to better myself and bless some people along the way. I don't think there is a more fulfilling gift.